Little old lady

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her.

One of the bags was ripped, and every once in awhile, a $20 bill fell out onto the sidewalk.


Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and asked.  “Ma’am, excuse me.  There are $20 bills falling out of that bag.”

Old lady: Oh really? Damn! I’d better go back and see if I can find them.  Thank you for telling me officer!

Police: Well now, not so fast. Where did you get all that money? Did you steal the money?

Old lady: Oh no! No sir! You see, my back yard is right next the football stadium parking lot.  On game days, a lot of fans come and pee through a knot hole in the fence, right into my flower garden.  It used to really piss me off.  Kills the flowers and plants, you know. Then I thought, why not make the best of it? So now, when there are games in the stadium, I stand behind the fend by the know hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers.  Every time some guy by sticks his dick through my fence, I surprise him by grabbing hold of his penis, show him the hedge clippers and say, “Okay you prick, give me $20 or it comes off”!

Police: Well that seems only fair (laughing)! Okay.  Good luck!…Oh, by the way, what’s in the other bag?

Old lady: Well, you know officer…not everybody pays…

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