In and out #PetPeeveStories

A common scenario in any place is the flow through the door. Yes, the door will have a say in today’s blog. Even for just a segment, appropriate behaviour should be exercised when going “in and out” of the door.

1. Out before in.

Always let the people going out of the door first before entering. And I mean any door! Elevator door, automatic revolving doors or sliding doors, doors with handles – as long as it’s a door – let those coming out move first before moving in.

Let’s put a better example. I’m sure we all have a closet! When the closet is so full, every time we open the door to place something IN, everything comes OUT first before things can fit inside. Same logic stupid!

It peeves me when I see people rushing into an elevator when the door opens! Its like you want to scream, let the people out first!

2. Disabled and the elderly

Allow the disabled and the elderly access out and in through the door. In like manner, the disabled and senior citizens should nevertheless follow rule #1 above. Out before in. The rule of allowing the elderly and those with infirmity access ahead is ALWAYS superseded by the first rule of thumb through any portal – let people out first before you move in.

3. Being a child is no excuse

You know how it is when kids rush through the door when it opens? Let me remind the parents and guardians that the child is YOUR responsibility. You cannot just shrug your shoulder and say, “well he’s a kid”! No! You teach that kid good manners and appropriate conduct. Hold the child, and tell him/her, to allow people out before going in with the child. And that rushing into an opening IS NOT right. When your child bumps into other people on their way out, always remember to profusely apologize for the misbehaviour. It was wrong. You’re sorry. And teach the child to say sorry too. At any age and circumstance, rule #1 always supersedes all rules.

Manners and right conduct for kids – Part 3 #PetPeeveStories

Table manners tell us a lot about how kids are raised. Nothing speaks more of an individual than proper table manners. Cultural differences may serve as minor excuses for a little variation or two, nevertheless, there are general rules for table manners in children that we need to teach and remind them of (and I guess that’s true for adults as well):

Washing hands before and after eating. Proper hygiene is important in children because most of them come from playing and touching dirty objects. It reminds them that cleanliness is next to Godliness.

Chewing, talking and swallowing are three movements that cannot be done simultaneously. Even when it CAN, this is not a “Got Talent” show! Spit flies, words are not understandable and the child can choke on his food.

Table manners include manners on how to use those utensils and other paraphernalia properly. Use the right utensils when eating. If there are chopsticks in a restaurant and the child does not know how to use one, ask the server for spoon and fork. The restaurant IS NOT the appropriate place to teach and learn how to use chopsticks. It just makes a mess all over the table and believe me when I say that the sushi flies!

Sound effects are not part of eating. No slurping of food please. Use the napkin (which you must always ask for) and wipe your mouth for any dribble of food.

And finally, don’t forget to say thank you and please. Please pass the salt. Please reach me the fork. Thank you for a lovely meal. Thank you for cooking for us. Please, may I have seconds? Please and thank you are words that make mealtime an appreciative one.

Manners and right conduct for kids – Part 2 #PetPeeveStories

To continue from yesterday’s blog post on manners and right conduct for children, we will tackle appropriate etiquette on how kids should deal with adults and other children (and friends).

Part 2 – With adults and other children

Dealing with adults involves a learning curve. As Filipinos, we teach the kids to say “po” as a sign of courtesy and respect to our elderly.

When talking to adults (or other kids), remind them to look at people in the eyes. It’s a sign of proper communication and respect. And being able to tell the truth.

Don’t interrupt when people are talking. I remember my teacher in college algebra telling us that “when you are talking and I am talking at the same time, one of us is bastos (rude). I’d rather you be rude than me.”

Don’t use foul language. It’s important that those swear words are used sparingly. They’re signs of being raised by barbarians.

When you’re with other children, it’s important to remember that patience is a virtue. Wait for your turn. Falling in line is a sign of discipline. There’s an experiment that was done in children that showed kids who were more patient were highly correlated with discipline.

Never make fun of anyone. Bullies are made, not born. When your friends abuse other people, it’s not okay. And it doesn’t matter that it’s not okay to be cool. Being cool by hurting others is never okay.

Using kind words and giving compliments among other children are reflective of the kind of family they come from. And these compliments must be truthful and come from the heart.

They say that what a child says is more often than not the truth. They blurt out what they mean. And mean what they say. We just need to teach them what is appropriate and what is not.

Rowdiness is a reflection of the kind of breeding we have. And it’s not okay.

Manners and right conduct for kids – Part 1 #PetPeeveStories

Children are usually a bundle of joy and laughter. Some are also the devil’s advocate. And I’m sure you’ll agree with me that kids today (and the youth in particular) lack a lot of basic public etiquette.

Good manners and right conduct seem to have been thrown out of the window because guardians and parents spend less time with their children. They’re usually left to an electronic baby sitter or a nanny who wouldn’t care less (or is totally clueless) when it comes to child rearing.

Whatever the reason, a rude child is the making of a rude adult. An ill-mannered individual is not born. They are made. So before we all go ranting with anger on why so on and so forth are uncivilised people, they have a past. And it begins during their childhood years.

I will divide the blog into three parts (otherwise it gets to be too long):

1. Manners in general

2. With adults and other children

3. And at the dinner table

And you may have other thoughts you wish to share (so feel free to leave a comment). This is being written, as a gentle reminder on how to raise our children properly. Remember- we reap what we sow!

Part 1 – The General Rules

1. Always say thank you and please. Gratitude expressed is always appreciated. Most especially from someone you expect to hear the “thank you” from. Brighten up someone’s day – don’t forget to say please and thank you. Always.

2. Say hello and goodbye. At the clinic, I greet each of my little (and older) patients with Hello and close the consultation with a Goodbye. It’s always good manners to teach children proper greeting manners as well. Just to make sure that they’re not a robot.

3. Holding the door open for people is a nice gesture. When kids see adults running towards the open door and slamming it against other people, they think that it’s an appropriate behavior. Exiting and entering are manners should be taught. Reminder – allow people to exit first before entering. Rule of thumb is OUT before IN!

4. Kids intelligence should not be underestimated. Remember, they hear, see, feel, taste and smell what we do. Those sneaky things that we do under their very nose which they see and hear. Or those bad habits we have like being late or screaming at one another at the dinner table or whispering about bad secrets which they overhear.

5. Manners are important. Sitting properly. Cleaning up after making a mess. Covering your mouth when you sneeze. Saying “excuse me” when you need to interrupt a conversation. Saying sorry when you bump into someone accidentally. Learning how to answer the phone properly. Manners matter.

Raising a child should be based on our standards. Not theirs. And the kind of child you raise is a reflection of our child rearing.

Mobile phone etiquette #PetPeeveStories

We all have one (or two or more) mobile phones. Most have the latest models. And in spite of the billions of mobile phones in the world, mobile phone etiquette is understated. It’s irritating to see how people (including me) have pet peeves on others who don’t seem to observe respectful behavior when using a mobile phone. In an age where smartphones are the rule than the exception, here are a few reminders on cellphone etiquette.

1. Texting and sharing

Avoid sending too many messages without getting a reply from the initial message you sent. And try to make sure that you read back what you text and check who you’re sending your message to before pressing send. Texting several messages in a row makes you seem needy.

K, LOL, GTG…and other acronyms should be avoided. There’s auto correct. Avoid using acronyms especially if only you can understand. Besides, it’s not cool. It makes you look ignorant at spelling.

When you’re in a group thread, be mindful of the sentiments of the group. You cannot just point what you wish. Jokes, prayers, daily rants, food posts, personal events – should be in a separate thread. There are group threads that are “official” and serve for announcement of work, information or group related activities. Being sensitive to other people is basic etiquette.

When texting, don’t text or email with ALL CAPS ON. Nobody likes being shouted at.

Don’t send “round robin” chain messages. It’s irritating and seriously, if chain messages were true, the devil would have died long time ago.

2. Look at the face not the phone

When we are with people, it’s important that we look at their face when talking to them and NOT the phone. It’s highly inappropriate that you’re staring at the phone during a conversation, a conference or meeting.

3. Silence should be observed

Keep your phone in silent mode during times that will require silence – at church, in meetings, during a conference, in the movie house, concerts, libraries, funerals. For your information, they’re universal quiet zones. It’s irritating to hear blaring Voltes V or Mission Impossible ring tones at these places.

4. Inappropriate

Don’t leave phones on dinner or dining tables. It’s a sign of expecting a call and hurrying up the party you’re dining with. It’s rude.

Don’t make a waiting or service staff wait for you to finish your conversation. When you’re in a group meeting or party and receive a call, be excused, step out of the meeting, and take the call outside. Not everyone has to hear how you closed a billion pero deal.

Watch the volume of your speaking voice. You don’t have to scream when talking. If you can’t hear the other party, it must be the connection is choppy, the volume of your phone is low, or you’re tone deaf. If you’re fighting with the other party, go out of the room and scream at the top of your voice in private. We don’t have to listen to your sh*t.

And if your kids are playing games, turn the volume down. Everyone doesn’t have to hear those irritating repetitive sounds. When you’re in a restaurant, it’s irritating to have a child watching in full volume, her fave movie. Get her a headset.

Remember, being considerate of others particularly in public mandates us to learn phone etiquette.

@the restaurant #PetPeeveStories

If there’s anything any of us love to do, it’s to eat. While you can eat in your underwear or slippers or with your feet up on the chair at your home, you can’t do the same in a restaurant. Whether it is a fast food joint, casual or formal dining, there are rules on proper behaviour in a restaurant.

1. Psssttt…waiter

Nowadays, most restaurants have nameplates for their crew. That’s so that you can call them by their nicknames. It makes it less degrading than hollering waiter or waitress. That’s what the nameplate is there for!

And I cannot stand this Filipino habit of grabbing someone’s attention by pouting his lips and making the sound “psssttt” to call a waiter (or anyone for that matter). It is humiliating and rude.

Wait for the server to approach you. They usually introduce themselves and REMEMBER their name!! It is good practice to make sure that when you need anything again, you don’t just drag any other waiter or say “psssttt”. That’s the reason why in the restaurant they start off with: “Hi! I’m (name of server) and how are you guys doing today? I’ll be your server. Here’s the menu. Can I start you off with some drinks? If there’s anything you’ll need, just let me know. Again, my name is (—) and I’ll be your server today”.

2. Who pays the tab?

When friends decide to go out for a meal and some drinks, it’s usually “dutch”. Which means, you pay what your order.

When someone INVITES you to a meal, the HOST always pays the bill (regardless of gender). Don’t invite people to a meal and expect them to pay for it. After all, it is good etiquette that whoever invites you, foots the tab. Hence, if you say, “you guys want to go grab a bite to eat?”, then expect to pay for that meal! If you want to make it clear that each one pays his own meal, say it so from the get go. If you don’t say anything, remember the rule – HE WHO INVITES, PAYS FOR THE MEAL!

3. BMW rule

When you’re at a formal dining event and you encounter all those cutleries and glassware on the table, a lot of us are flabbergasted because we don’t know how to go about this setting.

Rule of thumb is BMW – Bread, Meal and Water.

The left side of the table is the bread and butter plate. In the middle is the meal. At the right side is the water glass.

When there are multiple cutleries, use the utensils on the farthest end and work going towards the middle plate as the meals are served.

4. Bags and groceries off the table

Even if your bag is a Hérmes or Prada, no bags on the table please. Social climbers with no etiquette do this to show off. It’s a distraction and you shouldn’t actually be mixing books, cellphones, keys, gadgets and groceries on the dining table. If food or water gets spilled on it, your throwing a fit won’t help because in reality, only food and drinks served should be on the table.

In finer restaurants, they offer seats for your delicate LVs or other branded handbags and smaller items. Others have hooks under the table for your carry on bags.

5. Pass the salt PLEASE

When you need something that’s not within your reach, ask your companion to kindly pass the food or utensil or container or whatever! Don’t reach out for it by stretching out your arm in front of other people especially when they’re all trying to stuff food into their mouth already.

6. Chew with your mouth closed

Proper decorum dictates that we don’t make a lot of noise when we eat. Unless of course the restaurant is themed for that purpose. Many Chinese, Japanese and Korean restaurants have food (usually broth) that’s best eaten with a slurping and chomping sound so that it’s authentically “appreciated”.

As a general rule, however, don’t chew with your mouth open. You are not a monkey.

7. Food from plate to face NOT face to plate

Bring your food to your mouth. That’s correct. When eating, the direction should be from plate to face. Lean back and enjoy the meal by picking up the food with the utensils (or hands) and bringing it to your mouth. Never put your face into the plate. Only four-legged animals do that.

8. When to bring the kids

Unless your children have mastered good manners and proper conduct and can behave in a restaurant, you may want to keep them in a leash at a fast food joint or a family-themed casual restaurant. Fine dining is not appropriate for children who cannot observe the rules. Why people go to a more upscale restaurants is not only the ambience and the food, but the privacy and quietness of the environment. It doesn’t matter if you can buy the restaurant. If your children are uncouth, have no table manners and misbehave – you’re not welcome in these establishments. And when people being to stare at you and your children while they’re horsing around, you deserve the dressing down with the gazes from the crowd.

9. The napkin is not a tissue paper

Table napkins serve the purpose of cleaning your mouth when food comes in contact with the surrounding area. When you have snot, or a bad cold or allergy, and need to blow out all that mucus, for God’s sake, excuse yourself from the table, stand up, and go to the bathroom and use the tissue paper there. And don’t forget to wash your hands before returning to the table.

10. Breaking bread

Use your hands when breaking any form of bread. Even if you have to knead it slowly, use your hands. Don’t pick up the butter knife and attempt to slice open the bread using the butter knife or any other knives on the table.

I’ve left a nice poster reminder here for additional etiquette and manners when you’re dining alone or with your friends. Remember, while you pay to enjoy the meal, so do others. If you want to eat like a slob, do it within the confines of your home. Order a take out.

@the supermarket #PetPeeveStories

You know that those little kiosks that are right outside the area of a supermarket? Yes. Those food stalls outside the perimeter of the cashier in all the supermarkets? There’s one at a Robinson’s Supermarket near our home. After buying my grocery, I noticed that there were some food at the kiosk that I wanted to try – fried vegetable lumpia and turon! I asked the attendant for 3 pieces each. He turned to me and nonchalantly looked at me and asked for the receipt. I was baffled and he said, pay first at the cashier and come back. I turned my head to the cashiers, the queues were already long (there were only 3 registers open) and when I turned back to him, he was busy texting on his phone with his back to me. Really?!? There’s no sign that said that you needed to pay first before you could order. Besides the food stall is AFTER the cashier! It didn’t make sense that I’d enter the food stalls, then go inside the supermarket later and then pay for what I want to order! What if after my grocery, what I wanted to buy at the food stall had ran out and I’d already paid for it?!? I’d queue again to get a refund? It didn’t make any sense at all. So the food stall is owned by Robinson’s Supermarket but that wasn’t the point. The point was that it was not a very bright idea to make people have to queue back to the cashier AFTER they have already left the area. Other people in line will not appreciate it. Second, the logic didn’t make sense. Why will I even pay for something I’ve not even seen, more specifically food? While I understand that this supermarket branch may not have resources for adding another “cashier” just for the food stall (which I doubt), it’s a really dumb idea to make the customer go back to the queue once they’re out of the grocery perimeter already. I guess the reason for doing this was that not a lot of people buy from the food stalls for them to place additional manpower. When I was attempting to purchase food, I and one old lady were the only customers. What the attendant should have done was get our money, go to the cashier, paid for what we wanted to buy and come back with our receipt and change. Or, if that wasn’t his “role” (some employees are just not really proactive. They want to get paid but don’t like to exert more effort at work.), then he should inform the customer way ahead or even proposed to management to make a sign for those who don’t know Robinson Supermarket’s rules “PAY FIRST BEFORE ORDERING”!

I went up to the customer service, ask for the manager and told her that it was not a good idea to make customer queue again AFTER leaving the counters. Her reaction? She started berating all the cashiers and attendant. Like, duh?!?, it’s now their fault?!? I just walked away.

And after that quite long introduction to a scene the other day at Robinson’s Supermarket, here are other pet peeves I have in a supermarket.

1. Children shouldn’t be inside the pushcarts.

There’s a part near the handle of the pushcart that allows you to place your bag or a small child (1-3 years old, well maybe even up to 10 if your child is a dwarf) when you need to go to the supermarket with your (smaller) kid(s). That’s where the child should be. The idea is to keep watch over the child and restrain the child. The pushcart trolley IS NOT a baby stroller. Children who can walk should not be inside the stroller. You don’t know the last place where their feet landed on and you place them inside the pushcart and they’re there prancing and dancing! Then you pass by the fresh meat and fish and you’ve just mixed the turd your kid stepped on with all the food. It’s not hygienic to mix the child inside the pushcart. No supermarket cleans its trolleys! Be considerate of other people who still need to use that trolley. If your child is able to walk (and run) without supervision, make him/walk the whole time or bring a separate trolley for the purpose of lugging him/her around. Don’t use the supermarket pushcart.

2. The list and paying attention

There are distractions everywhere. Which means that it’s always a good idea before you go to the supermarket, to list down what you need to buy! That way, you can figure more or less which alley to begin and where to end. And you’ll end up spending less than what you should.

Many of those who go to supermarket don’t have a check list. What they do is make the trip to the supermarket like a trip to the mall. They go from alley to alley checking out what’s new and take a stroll like the supermarket is a park. And that’s a very bad practice.

Unsupervised children running and screaming around, people who park their pushcarts to chitchat (or text while pushing their pushcarts) and not mindful of other people around them, rowdy people who tag too close to you and run you over with their pushcarts – are common examples of why paying attention to a single task at hand is important.

3. Don’t block the aisles

It’s not the the aisles in a supermarket are the size of your streets. Which means that you shouldn’t leave your carts lying around while you’re off dashing to another alley. Bring the cart with you or park it in a designated area where carts can be left unattended unobstructing to others.

4. Place the merchandise back where it belongs

So you’ve decided not to buy the item. Thank you for leaving it where you picked it up. It’s a bad practice that we just leave a box of cereals jammed in between soap bars. It’s not just about, “that’s the supermarket employees job to put it back where it belongs” attitude. Sometimes this attitude ends up ruining the produce! Some of the items we put in the grocery cart actually get spoiled like when you grab a bag of fresh vegetables and leave them in the canned-goods section. If you decide you don’t want to buy that product, it is good etiquette to put it back where you originally found it.

5. Be considerate at the register

You’ve finally finished shopping. Hurray for you! As you plan to queue at the check out counter, please don’t forget to read the signs.

There’s an express lane for cash payment, less than 10 items only, senior citizens and PWD, and so on and so forth. Please be mindful of the signs! And queue properly. There’s no need to be angry when the place is packed to the brim. After all, you’re not the only customer there.

Speaking of which, if you have a full cart and the person behind you has just an item or two, you may want to make him go ahead of you and help make someone’s day.

6. Don’t park the cart anywhere

As you push your trolley out the supermarket, make sure that you bring back the cart after you’ve loaded what you purchased into your car. Never leave those empty carts in the middle of the parking lot. I see a lot of people who leave the carts behind. This practice predisposes untoward accidents to cars that are parked or are just plain road hazards.

Repetitively I will remind everyone that etiquette is being mindful of other people’s needs. It is being considerate. We can only be a better society if even in the smallest ways we care for others. Otherwise, we deserve where we are today.

Walk on the left, stand on the right #PetPeeveStories

There’s a video of SM Supermalls about escalator etiquette. One of my fave pet peeves.

It’s easy to remember


This video shows a painful reminder of everyone (especially Filipinos) who DO NOT know how to use escalators.

Whenever I travel to other countries whose airports have a walkalator, the signs are the same – walk on the left, stand on the right. You’ll also notice that it’s the Filipino who more often than not, disobey this basic rule.

Etiquette is what civilised people learn. I’m sorry if you feel offended with this insinuation because you feel alluded to. Etiquette is vital in our daily relations with people in society. It speaks volumes on our education and breeding. Strangely, while many Filipinos are actually aware of appropriate etiquette, they only practice this when they are in foreign lands.

They say you can tell the nationality of a person by his action. In a crowd crossing the street, you can spot the Filipino because he’s most likely the one attempting to cross the street NOT at the pedestrian lane. He’s most likely the person that, in spite of a queue, will go in front and pretend to wonder if there is a queue or not. And you will read this a lot in this month’s blog – about how no etiquette is tantamount to being rude.

And the escalator is a perfect example of basic etiquette. Repeat after me. WALK ON THE RIGHT, STAND ON THE LEFT! No further explanation is required. Yet when you go to a mall, you see people who don’t follow rules. Either because they don’t know or they are inconsiderate.

When parents bring their children to the mall or a place that has access to an escalator and are taking the escalator, place the child in front of you so that you can actually watch your child. Do not make the child stand on the elevator BESIDE you, with both (or more) of you hogging the escalator. That’s how accidents happen. It is never the fault of the escalator or the mall owner (unless the escalator blows up). It is always the parents (or guardians) fault when their children’s fingers (or God forbid, other body parts) get caught in the escalator.

Do not converse on thr escalator. For God’s sake, it’s a 10-15 seconds ride. Pay attention. Do not suddenly stop when you reach the end of the escalator because there may be people behind you that are actually still in motion! Do not text while on an escalator. Be mindful of the gap. Be mindful of the very short ride. When the escalator comes to a halt in the middle of the ride, PLEASE MOVE your feet (up or down). Do not wait for the escalator to move (which may take forever) because there are other people behind you who need to get somewhere rather than wait for you to move just because you’re waiting for escalator to actually move! Do not ride on the railings. Don’t tie your shoes when you’re on the escalator and the escalator is in motion. Don’t hog the escalator with your shopping bags and don’t leave them on the escalator stairs. Always carry the merchandise!

More often than not, etiquette is common sense. And we see a lot of that lacking, even among the educated. The illustration above should serve as a helpful guide to the do’s and don’ts when taking the escalator.


The gym (b)rat #PetPeeveStories

(Some language used may be inappropriate and are used for emphasis only. Parental Guidance is recommended.)

The gym is one of my favorite hang outs. Exercise, after all, is one of the key elements to staying healthy. The benefits of regular exercise include:

– feeling happier (with the release of endorphins)

– helps with weight loss or staying fit

– increases your energy levels

– keeps your bones healthy and tones your muscles

– reduces risk of chronic diseases and improves cardiovascular health

– maintains a healthy skin

– helps maintain your mental health

– improves your sleep and helps relax

– reduces pain and improves overall well-being

We all know these benefits and best of it all is that it slows down the aging process.

While the gym is a healthy environment to be in, there are just people who make it a stressful place to be in as well.

Etiquette in a gym is important because it’s a public space. There are other people who share that space with you.

Here are my peeves and my take on etiquette in the gym.

1. Sanitize

Since you’re going to sweat, make sure that you bring a towel and wipe off the sweat you make all over the equipment (and ask the gym for a mop if you sweat all over the floor as well). It’s a good advice that you bring your own towel even if the gym you go to provides you with towels. After all, no matter how the gym washes their towels, you don’t know how clean their laundry services are. Incidentally, all those warts on your skin are most likely from sharing towels.

2. Don’t hog the equipment

Being considerate with other people who need to use the other equipments is important.

If you’re a marathon runner, you probably owe it to yourself to buy your own treadmill. While running is a great fat burner, there are other exercises as well that will help you burn calories.

Don’t park in one equipment especially when you’re taking a call (leave the area and let someone use it first). And make sure that you alternate with others on the equipments. Ask nicely if you can do one rep. I’m sure they’ll always say yes.

3. Bring back the weights

Okay. Fine. So you’re a bodybuilder and you can carry a million tons. Who gives a shit if what you loaded on the barbels are left behind after you use it? I most commonly see this behavior among the teenagers who show off with their peers on who is able to lift the heaviest. When the group is done, they just leave the weights lying around. I usually sidle up to them and tell them firmly – kindly return the weights you’ve scattered to where they are placed.

Once you’re done with the equipment, remove all the weights and put them back to where they belong. Remember – others may not be able to lift as much weight as you do. And leaving some of the barbels on the floor is a recipe for an accident to happen – just because you were too lazy to bring it back.

4. Let others use the weights during your rest period

I mentioned about parking your ass. Well parking the dumbbells by your foot and holding to it for dear life while you’re resting is being rude.

Remember – the reps you do in a weight training program are shorter than the rest time! Why waste everyone’s precious time when we’re all paying the same gym fee? If you want to be treated like a king, go build your own gym!

5. Don’t drop the weights! (Unless it’s an emergency)

Usually this happens if you’re carrying more than what you can. Show off!

These bad things can happen to you when you drop the weights unnecessarily :

– damage the weights and the floor

– accidentally injure other members and yourself

– you can really annoy other members in the gym

Unless you’re going to die in front of everyone, don’t drop the dumbbells.

6. Do unto others you would want others do unto you

Do not blabber on and on to others. Make the conversation light and quick. Not everyone wants to be conservational while working out. The gym is NOT a golf course. This is not the right place to close deals.

Don’t give advice to people unless they ask for it. They may know more than you and may get offended by your “advice” and think that you’re trying to hit it off with them.

Don’t stare! Even if you’re ogling because you find them attractive or envious of their progress. Your staring will not make your body better.

Don’t forget to help people when they need it. When you see someone struggling with the weights, don’t think twice and just help him/her. Don’t look like a snobbish bitch and pretend that you didn’t see the person right beside you has dislodged the 200 pounds barbell. I’m sure you would want the favor returned if this happened to you.

7. Go to the gym like you’re on a date

Dress appropriately. Not like a slut. For guys, wear a jockstrap or underwear and don’t workout commando or freeballing. If s weird and it’s lascivious.

Smell nice. You don’t have to smell like a pimp or someone who took a bath with a gallon of Victoria’s Secret body wash. Just smell nice. Make sure if you have body odor, please paint yourself with all that deodorant. If you can’t smell yourself, I’m sure you can tell when people at the gym avoid you like the plague once you enter the pristine gates.

Keep your cellphone turned off or in mute always. No one wants to hear your Voltes V ringing tone and your blabbing at the top of your voice screaming at your wife who forgot to pay the bills today.

Even if these behaviors don’t get you banned or thrown out from the gym, observing them will end up in unnecessary confrontation with the guy who can lift ten of you over his head.

(p.s., It’s really not nice to lurk in the locker room and make conversations with your friends while your eyes are darting left and right at the other people undressing or be called a pervert!)

The late Mr Juan de la Cruz #PetPeeveStories

I am a tickler for time. I cannot stand people who do not observe other people’s time. It is rude because it is a total disrespect for another person.

My friends and foreign colleagues would always ask me, are Filipinos always late? I’d blush, look at them in the eye, and bravely retort, “well I’m on time.”!

It’s not okay that we get branded as a race that’s known for being perennially late.

When you go on a date and have to wait for your date for 1-2 hrs, and you’re texting or calling like there’s no tomorrow because you’ve got it all planned out and the restaurant only accepts reservations, it’s anxious to figure out if she’s coming or not. Because she seems to be running soooo late you’ll end up having dinner at a drive through. Isn’t it such a bummer?

When you make an appointment with someone at 8am and he waltzingly comes past 11am just because he had something “urgent” to do is irritating. It’s not like this appointment was all about his day. You’ve made your day fit into his and it’s but proper that he keeps your appointment as your personal appointment with others will get affected as well. Perhaps you can let it pass if this was the first time, but it doesn’t seem to be that way after your 5th meeting.

Late is late. There is no good excuse for coming late when an agreed time had been set. Whether you’re a government agency or a visa processing center or a health clinic or a school or a spa – it is not good practice to be late. Always.

Rules are:

1. If you’re running late and it’s a valid reason, kindly inform the other person you’re meeting up with. Send a text. Make a call. Shoot an email. Let your secretary know so she can let the other party know.

Remember – the anatomy of disappointment are expectations!

2. Keep an appointment book. You can even jot down your appointments on your calendar in your phone and turn on the alarm reminder! If you don’t know how, ask your friend this feature. If you refuse to learn this feature, throw away that smartphone and get a life!

3. Apologize profusely when you’re late. It’s your fault after all. And don’t make it a habit. It’s not appropriate to believe you’re the queen and you can get away with being late for anything if and when you want because in reality, you are NOT even a queen. Entitlement is not a right to being late.

And when you’re tardy, make sure you apologize profusely! Bring her flowers or take her out to wine and cheese…surprise her day! After all, it’s not been going too well for them, having to wait for you.

Let’s learn to be more conscious of other people’s time and our time as well. All that wasted time, after all, is counterproductive in life.