Common sense (gone)

Lawyer (L): Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?

Witness (W): No.  He was wearing a mask.

L: What was he wearing under the mask?
W: Errr….his face?

L: What happened then?

W: He told me, ‘I have to kill you because you can identify me.”

L: Did he kill you?

W: 🙄

L: Now sir, I’m sure you are intelligent and honest man.

W: Thank you.  If I weren’t under oath, I’d return the compliment…

L: You were there until the time you left.  Is that true?
W: 🤪

L: Were you alone or by yourself?

W: 🙄
L: You went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn’t you?

W: I went to Europe sir.

L: And did you take your new wife with you?

W: No.  I thought we needed some time apart.

L: You say that the stairs went down to the basement?

W: Yes

L: And these stairs, do they also go up?

W: 🤪

L: Have you lived in this town all your life?

W: Not yet.

L: Were you acquainted with the deceased?

W: Yes sir.

L: Before or after he died?

W: Seriously?

L: When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?

Other Lawyer: Objection! That question should be taken out and shot!

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