He speaks his mind…

Self opinionated or being straight to the point? Saying the truth or being upright?

Many people don’t like people who are contemptuous in speech, particularly when you’re expected to say things “nicely” and with “modesty”.

But being direct to the point can actually be insulting for some.  Others expect that whenever we speak, it is done properly and with tact.

I remember I once told someone that whenever we speak, we must practice how to be “politically correct” because not a lot of people understand why we say what we say.  Saying what one needs to say without being hurtful is an art.  Not everyone is able to get away with what one wants to or needs to say with the reason of “having to speak one’s mind“.

Speaking one’s mind is a reflection of one’s upbringing. It’s a cultural thing as well.  There are people who don’t like being directly called out for being wrong.  They mistake being told off as a sign of being rude.  But being honest about situations makes a healthy relationship.  It’s also a cultural thing to shrug off  opinionated people and regard them as being offensive or having inconsiderate behaviour.  After all, there’s a thin line between speaking out for justice and truth, and speaking out of hate.

There are two reminders I will share…

When anger rises, think of the consequences.

– Confucius

During fits of emotional distress, it is best that we get out of the room or try to avoid your mobile phone or laptop, so you can avoid the impulse of letting go awful and mean things (no matter how accurate) to say to others.  You can’t get that back when you’ve let it go.

Before you say something, think how you’d feel if someone said it to you.

Then there’s the other situation where we need to have a voice.

Many people, especially ignorant people, want to punish you for speaking the truth, for being correct, for being you.

Never apologise for being correct, or for being years ahead of your time.

If you’re right and you know it, speak your mind.  Even if you are a minority of one, the truth is still the truth.

– Gandhi

Calling and pointing out what is wrong, what is evil and what is not right should always be the right thing to do. But the circumstances on when to do it will require some degree of adroitness and sensitivity when dealing with difficult issues. Placing what is right in the right perspective is important for relationships in every sphere of life. Saying what is right without humiliating another is an art we all should try to learn.

There are situations where we just need to speak our mind.

The most important compass when we speak our mind is to “never worry about who will be offended if you speak the TRUTH.  Worry about who will be misled, deceived and destroyed if you don’t“.