I picked up that title from the tea I take every night. The major component of which are chamomile and lavender. And no, I’m not advertising the brand of tea. I’m just learning to destress my days ahead.

We all need to learn to ride the waves of anxiety. It’s not easy, but here’s a few thoughts that I’d like to share:

1. Meditation is the key to resting the weary soul.

Believe it or not, it’s difficult to deal with anxiety. While you look forward to better days ahead, there are just moments that are laden with uncertainties. Breath in deep and exhale slowly. Clear your mind. Refocus and meditate and clear the clutter.

2. Read inspiring stories instead of stressful ones. Watch a movie that will move your emotions rather than make you angry. May I suggest that you turn away from the news as you can’t distinguish the fake from the real, the confusing from the truth?

Yep! There’s been no better time to have media have their own interpretation than now. When the facts get distorted and a lie is tweaked to be the gospel truth then it’s time to shut down media as an appropriate source.

3. Listen to classical and instrumental music. Something soothing to the soul.

It’s always best to relax not only spirit but our emotions as well. And what better way to listen to sounds that appeal to calm. If you play an instrument (like I do, I play the piano), 30 minutes of this is therapy for anxiety.

4. Enjoy some moments with God. A few minutes at the adoration chapel helps relieve the burden.

Talk to God. He will always listen to you. He may not answer your questions but talking to Him is like talking to a friend. Unburden yourself to God. He is never judgemental and will provide you with the answers to your cross in due time.

5. Learn to inspire. The universe will always remember the kindness you share in spite of the hate.

Karma is a bitch. Don’t burden yourself with payback. Forgiveness is a virtue. Remember – you set yourself free when you forgive those who have wronged you.

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story about you”

– Maya Angelou

The Three Wise Monkeys, together embody the proverbial principle “hear no evil , see no evil, speak no evil”. It also refers to those who deal with impropriety by turning a blind eye.

It’s difficult when you’re in a situation where you’re a witness to wrong doings, speak out about the wrong in the hope of making things right and yet your own colleagues keep silent about the wrong. It’s sad because it sends a wrong message to the people whom harm has been done. There is just no moral support and it is traumatic (which is an understatement) to have to see someone go through this.

When someone distorts a lie to make everyone believe it is the truth, then it is evil and immoral. There’s a lot of that going around because purveyors, publicists and vagabonds will always need a job. It’s their business of integrating fantasy into what is real, unfortunately, to the point of having the reader or public initially question the facts, eventually muddle it up, and finally make the lie the gospel truth.

It is sad because good people deserve a better shake at life. We cannot just shrug from afar and watch good people go down because we don’t (pardon my French), give a f*ck!

If we simply stand back and watch and tolerate the evil that men do, then we are accomplices to that evil. We perpetuate it.

I am writing this for a friend who has seen darker days. I cannot promise you brighter days ahead. But I will pray that you too may have people who will support your quest for justice because life should give you a fair shake at happiness.

Things don’t usually work out the way we want. You land a job that eventually sucks or a relationship that doesn’t work out because someone cheated on you or a friendship that gets broken because of some form of betrayal.

Whatever hurt is caused, overcoming that pain is a hurdle. Making rational decisions are mired during those painful moments. One can not contain anger and simply brush off the pain with a whiff. The need to understand the circumstances surrounding this are stressful and when anxiety builds up, it distracts your way of thinking.

But why do these things hurt us? The answer lies in trust issues. We trust the other party too much. We don’t expect that we will get used by them in order to achieve their goal. We end up blaming ourselves because we were blindsided.

To survive in life, one should expect the unexpected. In order to protect ourselves from getting hurt, we need to be kind to ourselves by trusting less and forgiving often.

I’m not talking about paranoia (but yeah sometimes it gets to that point). We just need to be careful about other people’s motives in life. Not everyone you meet on your life journey will stay the rest of your life. What I’m driving at, is that we all need a Plan B in order to survive.

Plan B is thought of well. When one sees the signs that are disruptive in a relationship, you need to ask the unasked questions – why is it happening and where is it headed? Asking the why may need some head on confrontation or dialogue. But it’s hard to figure out the other side when the other side is blindsiding you. More often than not, you can’t tell because only the other person has plans on where this is leading to.

Plan B is for everyone. It’s a safe exit to sanity and yes, becomes a useful tool as a reality check. It’s those “I told you this would happen or I told you so moments” that make Plan B a safe zone to run to when all hell breaks loose.

Plan B, takes reflection and planning and knowing when to execute the plan. A shift in career or resignation from work, calling a relationship quits, breaking the bond of friendship – whatever the problems that hound us, there should always be Plan B.

When you have a good exit plan, your safe zone of Plan B will always keep you going. Moving on becomes less difficult. And you end up a lot happier by making the right decisions in life.